Friends

One of the main reasons as to why I don't go out as much as I'd like is because I have no money. Even if I did some how miraculously became employed and had some cash in hand, I feel like I don't have the type of friends who'd want to go out and just chill. I no longer consider myself as "a part" of any social group. I'm more the type of person who attends events if I'm invited or notified. Other than that I feel like I have nothing to do in life.

I feel quite distant from everyone despite seeing people's faces here and there. The difference between seeing someone and hanging out to me is more based around the idea of "how intimate you get".

I'm not quite sure whether I should be searching for new people to bond with or if I'm supposed to just gladly accept my miserable life.

Hair

I hate how my face is so damn hairy... there's hair literally everywhere which discourages me from shaving.
If I shave my chin, it'll most likely look really light whereas the rest of my face is dark cause of baby hair everywhere hence if I do shave, I have to what... shave my whole damn face which can't be easy having pimples and shit

I'm too fucking emotional

I feel like I should just back off and watch what happens

Damn straight

After being alone for a while I started thinking. I always found myself to be the type of person who'd easily adjust whenever I'm introduced to something "different". I'm the "go with the flow" kind of guy you see; I don't change willingly but if I feel that I need to I will do it whether or not I want to. I don't have much of a choice, I don't control how I feel. There's a certain extent to how much a person has control over their feelings.

To an extent I can control how I feel towards people or pretty much try to hide my emotions but every human being can break. I didn't give much thought into this but the way I'm feeling now can no longer be kept and dealt with by myself. I need it written down and maybe one day when I check back, I'll be reminded of how I dealt with my current situation.

Not sure that I like what the people around me are becoming

So much negative energy, I want to just let it all go and not think about it